Since I've had this site, I've just been ranting and bitching about certain things and I fear that I might be over-exaggerating. I appear as a bitter, self-centered, asshole with nothing better to do. I want everybody to know the real me, so I will tell you all some things about me, so you can know me better.

I play football, but I hate it, and don't know why I won't quit.

My friend and I play a game called thongs. We add a tally on a piece of paper for every thong we see. Whoever has the most thongs at the end of the year wins. I have 8 and he has 10. I think he's full of shit, though.

I hold the world record for distance ejaculation.

I am a pirate. When I'm not sailing around looking for people to rape, loot to steal, and ninjas to kill (because pirates are better than ninjas) I update my Xanga and write stupid bullshit on it.

I sometimes wonder if Chewbacca has to shave his pubes.

I ate McDonald's once. I almost threw up and stuck my foot up the manager's ass.

I laugh when people fall over in my school.

I make fun of somebody just because he has diabetis.

Chuck Norris and I sometimes get together to play go fish. I beat him once, but I think he let me win.

I have hair growing on my palms.

I have a huge history thing due tomorrow and I havn't even started on it yet.

I hate history.

WhEn I tYpE lIkE tHiS, i AnNoY pEoPlE

I LOVE CAPS LOCK!!!!111one

I think I'm stalling so I don't have to do my history.

I hate it when I have to piss in the morning, but I have morning wood.

No hablo español.

If you are like me (and if you aren't, then you wish you were) then you should be pretty fed up with pseudo-intellectuals ruining quotes from people who had a semblance of an idea of what the hell they were talking about. Stupid quotes are everywhere. They are on some featured xangas, with the whole post containing random ass unimportant quotes from people that are most likely dead. They are on posters in classrooms so you have something to read while you don't pay attention, but you read it, and get so violated with stupid that you have no choice but to turn your head back around and listen to morons attempt to read shitty books like To Kill a Mockingbird. That's why I don't like it when people want each person in the classroom to take turns and read out loud for everybody. I go much faster than everybody else when I read alone, because I am better than everybody in the classroom, including my teacher.

 If I have to read another poster quoting Einstein's "great minds encounter great opposition from mediocre minds" quote or something like that, I will snap. I'm not even kidding. I'll pick up a crowbar and bludgeon a little girl, or a poodle. Most likely both. Just because you can quote Einstein doesn't make you Einstein. Please stop. If anything, you should be arrested for Intellectual property theft. Oh man that would rule. No more stupid quotes. I'm getting a chubby just thinking about it.

The one person that's the worst about it is my Geometry teacher. I'm glad I don't have that class anymore. Thank God for summer. Anyway, in her class, before we started learning about stuff that I wouldn't use in the real world, she made us write down in a journal 2 sentences or so about a dumbass quote she had on the board. They weren't good quotes by any means. They were shit in the most literal way possible, without actually being a steamy pile on the floor. They were quotes like "Don't eat your own heart" -Wally Amos. First of all...WHAT? What the fuck does that mean? I couldn't think of anything worth a damn to write, so I wrote something just as intellectual. "I guess this quote means that hearts aren't edible." I deserve an A for effort. Half of her dumbass quotes were from Wally Amos. It's like that fucker had a professional job just to fire off a shit cannon (AKA: his mouth) all day. I could have sworn that she was about to run the tap of dumbass quotes dry. I wouldn't have been suprised to see something like, "Don't quote me on this, but I'm a dumbass" -Wally Amos at the end of the year.

That reminds me of how much I hate Geometry. My Geometry teacher (I won't say her name, because I don't want to embarrass Mrs. Case too bad) was an ugly hippie. She never wore shoes. She took like 2 months off because she had a baby. I was in shock, not because we were going to be stuck with an equally shitty sub for 2 months, but I didn't know how somebody could be drunk enough to knock her up. The sub sucked, but at least she was easier on the eyes. Everybody's grade dropped a letter grade at least, and we all were suprised to actually want Mrs. Case to come back. When she finally got back, it didn't take too long to figure out that she sucked just as bad as the sub. What does this have to do with shitty quotes? Hell if I know.

It's barely been a week after this Virginia Tech shooting, and there's already bullshit flying left and right (mostly left) about what would have prevented this tragedy. I've heard things such as the person who killed them all was just lonely and this would all be prevented if people accepted him. I have to listen to this story every time there is a school shooting. I hear this just as often as the gunman kills himself after he shoots everybody (every time). That's not even hear as bullshity as the theory that gun control would have stopped all of this.

The main thought of somebody that supports gun control is that these people won't ever get a gun if possessing them is illegal. Now let's get something straight.  The criminals will get their guns one way or another. If guns are made illegal the criminals will get their guns the same way they do a lot of things; they break the law. It's pretty much a well known statistic that 100% of criminals break the law. It's common sense, which apparently a lot of people lack. I don't think that a criminal will get a gun licence and purchase a gun legally the way that law-abiding citizens would.

So if you take away the right to legally get a gun, you are taking them away from the people who would use them for protection. In a world where the gun control fanatics win, only the bad guys have guns. What a utopia.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=kWeTEXSV7ts
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Po8ywLD3f-k
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psEjU550xmw